Kuma's

words and lyrics by Scrand

kumas is a metal bar

in chicago

and kumas is the best metal bar in the world

and kumas has the hottest girls

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh

the best metal hamburgers

the best best burger in the world

kumas is the best bar the best metal bar in chicago in the world

and its the best metal bar in the world

kuma's dayenu

What is your song idea?

I made the unbrutal but necessary move out of Chicago almost a year ago. There's lots of things I miss--awful public transit, politeness--but the one thing that has no equal is the greatest metal bar on the planet, Kuma's Corner (2900 W Belmont).

Good bars do one thing well, and bad bars just serve alcohol. On any characteristic, Kuma's destroys other bars. Your favorite bar has a nice jukebox? Kuma's plays ear-splitting death metal from open to close. Your bar has hot waitresses? Kuma's waitresses are hotter, and will beat yours in a knife fight. Your bar serves food? Kuma's has the best burgers, universally acknowledge by god and man.

Any one of these things would be enough, but the fact that Kuma's does all of these better than any other bar proves that there is a god, and he's a metal god. Maybe Cthulhu or Odin.

Can you write me a song that's a tribute to Kuma's? The word 'dayenu' should be in the chorus. It can be straight description or a narrative (possibly about the waitresses or the customers). Or you can just steal lyrics off the menu. Actually, steal a lot of lyrics from the website, because it's chock full of their philosophies. (e.g. "death to miller and budweiser", "die, emo, die", etc.)

The style should be metal, obviously. True norwegian black optional.

describe your song in one word

dayenu